Actual headline I just read:

“Swiss Troops Accidentally Invade Liechtenstein”

Is it just me, or does ‘invading Liechtenstein’ sound like a euphemism for something naughty?

Allow me to take a brief time out from the sunshine and daisies that normally grace this space and do a little complainin’.

I know; so unlike me.

Here’s the thing. It’s fine if you call me because someone told you I was an “expert” in something. But if you explain your issue to me and I apologize but assert that I am neither an expert in said realm of knowledge nor do I know who is, it is NOT fine for you to become exasperated and snippy with me. It is not ok to become “well, so-and-so seemed to think you’d have the answers” passive agressive on me.

Oh, and also, if you happen to be a member of the US Postal Service and are surly and unhelpful to me at the counter to the point where I begin to consider asking for my mail back and driving to another much more inconvenient post office just so I don’t have to deal with you, it is decidedly not ok to then try to sell me on “Chinese Year of the Pig” stamps or some such nonsense.

That is all.

Things I heard the crazy man say on the Green Line at about 5:30 yesterday evening:

• “RaaaaarrrrRRRrrr!”
• “Not gonna get me off the train no matter who they talk to.”
• “I know people. I KNOW people goddammit.”
• “fuckin’ people with their fuckin’ attitudes.”
• “Ha! Ha HAH!!! HAAAAHHH!!!!!”
• “Karate.”
• “All a matter of perspective.”
• “perSPECtive”
• “PERspective”
• “perspecTIVE“
• “Oprah’s got it, Janet’s got it. I think I got it too.

And finally, as he got off the train at Metro Center, “Later white girls!”