Hello, friends!

I’m an elusive li’l bastard, ain’t I? Just when you think I’m starting to keep to an almost-regualr posting schedule, I run away to the beach for a few days. And when I come back, I act like I’m more interested in playing Rome: Total War than in updating this here blog. Which, of course, I am.

Don’t think I haven’t had the best interests of you, the reader, in mind though. I have been spending this away-from-the-blog time in the most productive way I can; by thinking of ways to make the world a better place.

I present it to you now. My list of ways to make the world better. I have titled this list

THINGS THAT PISS ME OFF (in no particular order)

• people who back in to their parking space and aren’t driving delivery trucks
• people who ask for your advice and then talk over your answer
• moreso if the talking-over consists of what they think you will say
• coworkers who monopolize your time and then refer to themselves as “your favorite person” when calling to ask for one more thing
• empty bathroom. guy comes in. sits in adjacent stall. buffer, dude. buffer.
• that bastard the Dalai Lama
• (ok, not really. just thought it would be funny)
• bullet-pointed lists that go off on a tangent
• the contractors who just poured a new parking pad for my house-flipping neighbor and left all their debris in the alley
• laundry
• tailgaters
• use of speakerphone when not necessary. (the only times speakerphone is necessary involve gov’t experts working to deflect an asteroid or perhaps the ‘phone a friend’ portion of ‘Who Wants to be a Millionaire?’)
• running out of ideas

I’m not an angry man, I just want the world to be a better place.

Assholes.