{"id":128,"date":"2007-05-15T09:32:43","date_gmt":"2007-05-15T13:32:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/?p=128"},"modified":"2007-05-15T09:32:43","modified_gmt":"2007-05-15T13:32:43","slug":"the-bird-is-the-word-another-word-motherfucker","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/?p=128","title":{"rendered":"The bird is the word. (Another word? Motherfucker.)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I got flicked off this morning.<\/p>\n<p>Happy Tuesday to me, huh?<\/p>\n<p>In the shadow of the football stadium, there&#8217;s a little side road that I sometimes use to do an end-run around Russell street on those days that Russell is looking particularly cloggity. There&#8217;s a stadium parking lot to one side and so, half way down the street, there&#8217;s a cross walk for fans to use while walking to or from the game.<\/p>\n<p>On game day, I&#8217;d imagine there&#8217;s constant pedestrian traffic and a driver would have to stop to let the people pass.<\/p>\n<p>However. There is no stop sign. There are also, at 8:20 in the morning, no pedestrians present. Anywhere in view. At all. In the absence of a stop sign and pedestrians the crosswalk goes from being a crosswalk to just lines on the pavement.<\/p>\n<p>The road has two lanes, both going south. This morning, I was following a very slow truck down the little side street. We were in the left lane. I decided 10 just wasn&#8217;t my speed, so I got in to the right lane to pass the truck. I slid over and found myself behind a maroon sedan. As we approached the cross walk, the truck slowed down to stop. Why, I don&#8217;t know. Maybe he thought he had to. Maybe he was lost and was pulling over to look at a map. The maroon sedan in front of me must have figured there was a stop sign and slammed on its brakes. I had to stop too, coming a little closer to the sedan&#8217;s bumper than I would have liked.<\/p>\n<p>And we sat there. I checked (I had time); there were indeed no stop signs. There were no pedestrians. We were just sitting there at a non-stop sign waiting for the imaginary football fans to pass I guess.<\/p>\n<p>So I honked.<\/p>\n<p>And her middle finger shot in the air.<\/p>\n<p>We pulled up next to eachother at the end of the street. Me turning left, she turning right. I looked at her. &#8220;Fuck you asshole,&#8221; she said. &#8220;Not a stop sign,&#8221; I mouthed.<\/p>\n<p>And then we both smiled and laughed. Got out of our cars and hugged and had a good chuckle over the whole thing.<\/p>\n<p>No, not really.<\/p>\n<p>She yelled &#8220;motherfucker&#8221;, flicked me off again and peeled wheels.<\/p>\n<p>Don&#8217;t get me wrong, I hate getting honked at. But my brain is wired in such a way that if I get honked at, my first thoughts involve figuring out what I&#8217;m doing wrong and not finding the honker and overwhelming them with my middle finger of hate.<\/p>\n<p>It wasn&#8217;t a long beep and the Civic&#8217;s horn is not what I&#8217;d call intimidating. It was, I thought, a &#8220;hey, let&#8217;s get moving again&#8221; beep.<\/p>\n<p>To which, I suppose, the only rationall response is the bird. Motherfucker.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I got flicked off this morning. Happy Tuesday to me, huh? In the shadow of the football stadium, there&#8217;s a little side road that I sometimes use to do an end-run around Russell street on those days that Russell is &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/?p=128\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,11,10],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/128"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=128"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/128\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=128"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=128"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nerdhut.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=128"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}